Goodbye, Butterfly

Butterfly was sent to the donation bin today. I came into my daughter Sarah’s room to find that Butterfly (her night light) wasn’t in her usual place on the dresser. She’d been shoved aside to make room for a group of toy dog figures Sarah had...

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A Simple Plan For A Super 2017

New year vector designed by Ibrandify – Freepik.com I’m sure you’ve been thinking about what you want to accomplish next year. Will 2017 be the year you start a business? Lose 25 pounds? Run an ultramarathon? Get out of debt? Well, If you’ve decided you’re ready...

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How to access the energy and power of your ‘why’

Establishing a business is hard work. It requires going out of your comfort zone, taking risks, and developing new skills. You’ll have more than a few bumps along the way. It’s easy to start wondering whether it’s all worth it at times. When that happens, make sure...

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Are you at war with your feelings?

While I wouldn’t consider myself a highly sensitive person, I’m definitely more sensitive than average. No big deal, we live in a world that accepts feeling, sensitive men, right? Well, that hasn’t always been my experience, or the experience of many of my male...

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Do you get stuck in ‘conscious incompetence’?

Perfectionism, ironically, is an obstacle to growth. When I have clients who struggle with perfectionism, it’s usually because they have a misunderstanding of how the process of improvement and growth actually works. This leads to unrealistic expectations and...

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Is fear of the unknown keeping you stuck?

During the year 2000, I went through a significant personal crisis, one outcome of which was a plan to leave my technology career and become a psychotherapist. At the time I made the decision, I was feeling positive and re-energized from the personal growth work I’d...

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Hacking the brain for fun & profit

Back in 2000, I spent a year wrestling with the decision of whether to change careers. I’d been working in technology. I didn’t think I could do anything else. I didn’t think I could manage the change financially. I thought I was too old. Humans are, as Mr. Spock said...

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Confidence or courage – which comes first?

We humans get so many things backwards. I think it’s largely due to the design of our brains. We think: ‘I need more confidence, then I’ll be more brave.’ Here’s the problem: confidence comes from effort and results. We can’t become more confident in ourselves...

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Consider the Source

I was a pretty sensitive kid … and it was something that I was judged and criticized for a lot in my younger years. It became a source of shame for a number of years … until I came to really understand what a strength it could be and how to use it in a positive way....

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What if your story is wrong?

What do the negative voices in your head say about you? That you’re ‘stupid,’ ‘defective,’ ‘not good enough,’ ‘a loser’? Do they pile on with messages about how you’ll never change … about how you can’t change? Well, try some of these...

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You can’t think your way out of fear

  This seems counterintuitive, I know. After all, we use our brains to problem solve. So, we believe that … … If we just do enough thinking, we’ll be able to figure out a plan, a backup plan, and a backup to the backup plan. … If we just keep thinking about it,...

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