Counseling for Relationships

Good relationships don’t just happen!

When things are going well, relationships can be tremendously rewarding – nothing matches that feeling of connection when a relationship is at its best. When things aren’t going well, that same relationship can be one of the greatest sources of hurt & frustration in your life. While humans are naturally ‘wired for connection’, we aren’t wired with the skills required to build the kind of relationships we want to have. We live in a world that gives us thousands of unrealistic images every day of ‘healthy’ and ‘normal’ relationships’, and many of us weren’t shown a good relationship model by our parents. The result? Your relationship may have been a disaster waiting to happen from day one. But don’t throw in the towel just yet.

How can counseling help?

• I’ll help you see and understand the destructive interaction patterns in your relationship and develop the skills you need to replace those patterns with healthier ones.
• Emotional wounds are an inevitable part of being in relationships. However, many of us don’t know how to do the work of repairing those in wounds. In counseling, you’ll learn that vital skill.
• Through our work together, you’ll learn new tools for communication to improve intimacy, trust, and connection in your relationship.
• We face choices in our relationship on a daily basis – but often, we aren’t consciously aware of those choices or the potential impact of them.  Through our work together, you can learn how to recognize and assess those choices so that you can make the choices that support your long term relationship goals.
• We’re influenced by our past relationships and the relationships we’ve had close contact with (i.e. our family).  Counseling helps you to recognize those influences, how they impact your relationship expectations and choices, and how to change that.
• On an average day, you’ll see over 3000 advertising messages.  These messages construct a horribly distorted view of what’s ‘healthy’ and ‘normal’, leading to expectations that cause significant problems in our relationships.  I can help you learn the skill of critical awareness, which will enable you to recognize and disempower many of those outside messages.

This is your relationship, not mine

While I can (and will) tell you about what we know does and doesn’t work in relationships, the reality is that there isn’t one ‘right’ way to be in a relationship. It’s my job as a counselor to help you get clear about the sort of relationship you want to have and to help you recognize how to face the difficult choices you often face in your relationship in a way that supports the creation of your desired relationship.

Don’t continue living with an unhappy relationship

Research tells us that many couples wait as long as six years after problems develop to seek counseling. By then, the combination of negative interaction patterns and resentment can create an emotional hole that’s challenging to dig out of. If that’s where you are, don’t worry – it’s not too late to turn things around. If that’s where you see your relationship headed, take action now – if you don’t, it most likely will just get worse.

Learn more about me, find some relationship tips on my blog & find answers to questions many potential clients have elsewhere on my site. After you’ve done that, you can schedule an appointment online, contact me via my online form, or just call if you have additional questions.

One last note – If your partner is unwilling to come to counseling, don’t let that stop you – if you and I work on changing what you are doing in your relationship, your relationship will change.